Let's say it right away: being a gentleman is a quality that never goes out of style.
What does it mean to be a gentleman today, in a world where the rules of courtship and etiquette have changed? Here are some tips for being a modern gentleman.
Be polite.
Chivalry begins with politeness. Always be kind and respectful to everyone you meet, whether they're women, men, the elderly, or children. Use magic words like "please," "thank you," "you're welcome," and "excuse me."
Greet people with a smile and a nod. Never interrupt a conversation, raise your voice, or use vulgar or offensive language. Be careful not to make inappropriate or intrusive comments, especially if you don't know the person you're speaking to well.
Be generous.
Chivalry also involves generosity. Be generous with your time, money, and attention. Offer your help to those in need, without expecting anything in return. Offer sincere compliments and appreciate the merits of others. Give thoughtful and personalized gifts, without overdoing it.
Pay the bill on the first date, but don't insist if your date wants to split the bill. Open the door, hold your coat, let her go first, but don't be too pushy or patronizing. Let her decide how much independence and autonomy she wants.
Be honest.
Chivalry also requires honesty. Be honest with yourself and others. Don't lie, don't betray, don't manipulate. Be true to your principles and values. Don't pretend to be someone you're not, but show your true self. Don't hide your intentions, but be clear and direct.
Don't play with other people's feelings, but be honest and loyal. Don't be afraid to express your emotions, but also be able to listen and understand those of others.
Be elegant.
Chivalry also manifests itself in elegance. Be elegant in the way you dress, move, and speak. Choose clothing appropriate for the occasion, which should be clean, pressed, and neat. Don't overdo the accessories, but choose ones that enhance your style.
Don't be too stiff or too relaxed, but find the right balance between formality and informality. Don't be monotonous or boring, but use a varied and interesting tone of voice. Don't be banal or predictable, but use rich and original language.
Be yourself.
Chivalry isn't a mask to wear, but a way of being. Don't follow imposed rules, but follow your instincts and common sense. Don't copy stereotypes, but create your own model of chivalry.
Don't be a gentleman to impress others, but to feel good about yourself and those around you.
Don't be gentlemen just in words, but in deeds.
Don't be a gentleman just on some occasions, but in every moment of your life.
